Leading with Love and Curiosity
The lens through which we view life matters. May it be through the lens of love.
We are all leaders… ✨
In some capacity, we find ourselves making decisions and guiding others.
I know it has been some time since my last post, as a lot has shifted in my life over the past year. I left my teaching job of 17 years, went back to graduate school for counseling, became a certified Connected Families parent coach, and started piloting freedom groups at my church. As I navigated these new waters, I paused the AT THE TABLE podcast, trusting in God’s perfect timing and expectant for what He will do next.
Throughout this season, I am seeing the beauty and wisdom of some rhythms God taught me during my years in the classroom—rhythms applicable to almost every setting, space, and situation:
1) Practice the pause: Pause, pray, and pivot if need be.
“Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.”(James 1:19 NLT)
2) Lead with love and curiosity, rather than assumption.
“And you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength.’ The second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ No other commandment is greater than these.” (Mark 12:30-31 NLT)
The lens through which we view life matters. 🎨
Though I was never an art teacher, I vividly remember a high school art class where we were taught to draw by focusing, step by step, on each individual line rather than the full picture. With patience, time, and attention to detail, the picture was eventually revealed.
How we view the details shapes the picture we create. How we view ourselves and others shapes our delivery and our lives, too.
“The second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ No other commandment is greater than these.” (Mark 12:31 NLT)
Ask yourself:
Am I curious or condemning?
Am I speaking words of life or death?
Am I illuminating the gift or the flaws? The strengths or the weaknesses?
Am I loving or limiting?
“Ears that hear and eyes that see—the Lord has made them both.” (Proverbs 20:12)
In my Connected Families training, Jesus’s model of questioning was highlighted to me. In the Gospels, Jesus asked over 300 questions but answered only a few.
How can we model this?
By intentionally slowing down to learn about people, asking instead of assuming, listening to understand rather than to respond, validating before correcting, and pausing to lean into the Lord’s help in and through all circumstances. He is faithful.
I am so grateful that we not only have the best model in Jesus, but that He promises to supply the strength to do whatever He calls us to do. We are equipped and called, capable and loved. Let’s pray…
Dear God,
You are Creator of all things, You are the God who sees me (Genesis 16:13). You look past the outward appearances that so easily distract the human eye, and You look straight at the heart (1 Samuel 16:7). Forgive me for the times I have looked at Your children through a lens of judgment, comparison, or assumption. Today, I ask You Lord to shift my perspective. Remove anything that is blocking my eyes and heart.
Lord, give me ears that hear and eyes that see because they are gifts from You (Proverbs 20:12). Open my eyes to see the people around me the way You see them. Help me remember that every person I interact with today is fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14), created in Your very image (Genesis 1:27).
When I am tempted to judge quickly, help me to practice the pause. Remind me that You have loved us with an everlasting love (Jeremiah 31:3), and that You call us to walk in that same love. Give me the grace to clothe myself with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience (Colossians 3:12).
Jesus, You modeled a leadership of perfect curiosity and deep empathy. Help me to love not just in word or talk, but in deed and in truth (1 John 3:18). Let my speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt (Colossians 4:6), so that I might speak words of life that build up and embrace the moments entrusted to me (Ephesians 4:29). Remove any condemnation from my heart, reminding me that above all, love covers a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8). I pray to be filled with kindness and wisdom.
Help me to slow down, to ask rather than assume, and to illuminate the gifts and strengths You have placed in others rather than focusing on their mistakes. Let Your love be perfected in me, so that others might see You through the way I love and interact with them (1 John 4:12).
I humbly draw near to You. Help me stay in Your presence. I pull a seat up to Your table today, Lord, surrendered and ready to learn, grow and be strengthened. Shape my rhythm, align my heart with Yours, and give me Your eyes and heart for people. Help me see them through Your lens, the lens of love. I praise You for You are worthy all glory and honor now and forever. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Be blessed, and always remember you are so loved! ♡
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The Art of a Messy House updates:
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♡ Ready to shift your lens, ask better questions, and lead with grace and truth? Let’s connect—pull up a chair, and let's ignite possibilities at the table together. Let's chat about how parent coaching can transform your home. 🤍⬇️
https://www.theartofamessyhouse.com/coachingservices
or email me at jenkosuda@gmail.com
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♡ “To the Beat of My Father’s Heart,” a collection of daily devotions to ignite conversations with the Lord, is now available on Amazon.
♡ The podcast AT THE TABLE is on a break, but check out the links to part 1 of season 3 below. I would love to hear your thoughts as we continue the conversation with truth in love… AT THE TABLE. ♡ ♡
Episode 93: Introduction to AT THE TABLE
Episode 94: Flourishing (Who is at Our Table - part 1)
Episode 95: Finding and Cultivating Safe Spaces (Who is at Our Table - part 2)
Episode 96: Leading with Curiosity and Love, Not Assumption (Who is at Our Table - part 3)
Episode 97: Entrapped to Entrusted: Real Stories of Faith in Action with Jessica Rogers and Alyson Perez
Episode 98: Why am I Stuck? (Confess, Repent, and Transform)
Episode 99: Walking in the Blessing: Freedom is Our Inheritance with Andrea Brown
Episode 100: Walk in Authority: Unlocking Generational Blessings with Rebekkah Mauney and Jessica Williams
Episode 101: God's Presence & Your Purpose: A Guide to Overcoming Distraction
